Packaging November 29, 2011
Posted by lizp4 in Uncategorized.trackback
I think my kids think I’m so cool that I will tolerate just about anything. Since they are all grown and gone from home, and none are under 30, it probably seems more likely than I’d like them to think. The truth is, I’m a firm believer in ladylike modesty. Mona Charen had a wonderful article on it that puts it quite well, quite briefly.
Today’s young ladies are, as she said, raised in a “trash culture.” They are and do as they live and are taught. Who teaches them? Parents. Teachers. Peers. Publications. Television and movies. Why do we persist in teaching our daughters that trashiness, vulgarity, and sexual innuendo are cute and stylish?
When I was a teenager, we had standards that were 180 degrees from what is acceptable today. When I look at the big shows on television–the ones that draw the biggest audiences, like CSI and Without A Trace, what do I see? Young women dressed for business…in scoop-necked tanks that reveal considerable cleavage and camisoles that can’t conceal nipples, under business jackets. The camis and tanks are cut so low and made of such clingy fabrics that there is little left to the imagination of any man in their company.
Since when have nips and cleavage been part of the “power outfit?” I’m sorry, but I don’t think it’s necessary to flash one’s half-bared bosom or strut one’s panty-lines through one’s tight skirt or slacks in order to get a promotion. If she is working for a boss who not only allows but encourages this kind of display in the workplace, a woman should find employment elsewhere, because that kind of exposure says “I’m easy. Want a one-night stand?” I can just imagine the feelings of the husband of a woman who wears that kind of teasing, sexy clothing to a place of business.
Some things, such as cleavage and everything it might lead to, are better left to the imagination, and teenaged virgins have no business running around with their underpants showing above trashed-out bluejeans that barely clear their pubic area, or wearing tanktops that show navels, made of material that reveals everything from nipples to goosebumps.
It’s all in the packaging. What’s the label on your daughter’s teenaged body? Does it say, “Cheap and easy?” Perhaps it’s time for mothers to try to regain some sort of control over their daughters’ wardrobes. At least go shopping with them, and for Heaven’s sake, Mom, don’t be afraid to set an example.
/rant
We work very hard to keep the Oglet in appropriate clothing. It helps that she goes to a school that has a strict dress code.
You have to choose your battles wisely; there are some things to be lenient about, and some things to draw a hard line and never allow it to be crossed. Frinstance, the Oglet often wears pants that may be tighter than I’d prefer, but she knows that revealing tops and heels (Except for dances) are Not Done. She also understands that there is a list of language we find unacceptible, and a type of behavior we won’t tolerate. All her school friends seem to follow the same rules, and follow the same rules regarding after school behavior. So far, knock wood, its been working OK> Vigilance and prayer (AND setting a good example) make a difference.
I believe raising a chaste child is a parent’s greatest challenge, it’s got to mean a special place in Heaven for those parents. God bless you for your strictness. The Oglet will bless you later, too.
My experience was with boys, but I did try to explain about the importance of saving one’s virginity for marriage. Both boys, of course, declined the offer, being blindsided by testosterone long before they knew what it was.
Nowadays, when kids dress like ragpickers and hobos, it’s difficult to imagine something like that being alluring, but the imagination is the most erogenous zone we have.
Gosh, Liz, you must be almost as ancient and out of touch as I am! To say such things … just marks as left-overs from another age.
I fully agree with everything you said.
Thanks, Fr. D. It’s good to know that I’m really NOT the only parent in the world who put their foot down about dress codes. Grown women parading like hormonally-overwhelmed 14-year-olds really makes me grind my teeth. Adults are teachers, whether they like it or not. Kids may not know how to spell “hypocrite” but they can see it in the (presumed) grownups around them when certain examples are not set.